Lady Marina Cowdray

If there is anything that isn’t a match made in heaven, it is Lady Marina Cowdray and the media. She is shy, very private, and did not know me at all. And yet she was gracious, warm and took a leap of faith for the unknown as we spoke across continents for what turned out to be a fascinating conversation.

That she is a gifted sculptor is evident in everything her hands have created, but it’s the mystique and spirituality in each piece that is fascinating. If you see her most famous creation – “The Meditator” – you will know what I mean. When I first set my eyes on the 6 foot sculpture which is now available as a gorgeous pendant in different metals to suit every budget, I felt like I’d known The Meditator in many lifetimes. And why not? Who is The Meditator, but a reflection of what I was and can be in any lifetime.

As someone who has done some fascinating work and sculpted this amazingly magnetic piece – The Meditator – did you have a spiritual calling early on?

My father was born in 1911 and I was the eighth of nine children, so the atmosphere was very Victorian. The household was conservative. So I think it was more a religious household where my father would give a sermon every Sunday and we had to participate. My father was very evangelical and the sermons would occur even when we were traveling with him, so spirituality was a word I came to understand a lot later. It took me a long time to undo all the patterns that had left their impressions in order to appreciate that you don’t have to be deeply religious or dogmatic to be spiritual.

So were you a typical teenager, growing up?

Yes, a typical adolescent. We all are a sum of our conditioning. I was looking to fill what I felt was a void and so I was pushing all the boundaries in search of what I needed. I am very close to three of my siblings and they were my sounding board. At the same time the path anyone walks is their own and can be lonely at times, but once you recognize the patterns and the conditioning that is not healthy for you, and is limiting you incredibly, it puts you back on track.

I realize now how deeply I had to dig to find out who I was in order to help myself. I realized whenever someone pushed my buttons, be it a family member or someone else, that it was a blessing and it meant there was something I needed to look at.

I think my children, my parents, my husband, and really, everybody I’ve met in my life has been my teacher.

I lived with my grandmother in London and I got to know her a lot better than my siblings. I spent time with her after my grandfather died and she became deeply important to me.

I was 18 when I first read Eric Fromm’s book “The Art of Loving” and it was my grandmother who was a great influence in my life. My grandfather was also an artist and he was constantly in our lives. It was wonderful to have that relationship with my grandparents when we were growing up.

So when did you know you were creative and artistic growing up?

I don’t think anybody in my family thought I could draw. It was not until the early nineties that I got an understanding that I could be creative and then started to develop that. I think my mother thought I was a hopeless potter when I started and couldn’t believe her eyes when I started doing this kind of work.

And to be honest, I wasn’t looking. It just fell upon me. It was literally like that “Aha” moment when I suddenly realized I could do it. And I was totally taken by surprise myself.

What was most extraordinary was learning that my grandfather had written a book on India. My mother and I are putting that book together. He was an artist and I couldn’t believe he had put together, and written about all the religions in India.. This was a long time ago before the internet came into being so he had put in an amazing amount of research. What I noticed was that he was using a lot of these religious symbols in his art which I was also using.

He loved drawing mythological images. He drew carriage wheels, the Buddhist prayer wheels and it was very fascinating that he also drew in this book. What I have been doing in my sculptures he had been doing in his own paintings. It’s amazing how connected we all are to each others’ energies.

Top model, Eugenia Silva, wears Marina Cowdray’s “The Meditator” pendant in gold.
Click HERE to see a celebrity gallery wearing Marina Cowdray’s designs.

I believe, a great influence in your life was the renowned Pathologist, Reverend Dr. Martin Israel?

Yes he considered my grandmother his best friend. She took him in when he went through some very difficult times as he didn’t have any next of kin in the country.

After my grandmother died, he became a mentor and next of kin to me. My brother actually looked after him until he died. He was a very special man and my husband and I spent a lot of time with him. He married us. He was a physician and yet a very spiritual and open minded man. He was not a religious man and I realize now how lucky I was to have met him.

He showed me the road on which I started my journey. He taught me that there really wasn’t anything much to be feared. In religion you are often tied to it through fear.

You married into one of Britain’s most prominent families. How did you handle that? I often look at what being in the limelight did to Princess Diana. Did you walk that same path of over committing yourself?

I did take on a lot of responsibilities, and charitable work for almost two decades but somehow I felt that I should be doing that because that was expected. It was very exhausting trying to raise 5 children and keeping up with my commitments at the same time. But at that time I thought well it’s all a part of my journey. There is a lot of tradition in England, and expectations thrust upon people in that position and so it was no different for us. I felt that carrying on these traditions and responsibilities was something that I should do. I didn’t realize that it was not what my authentic self was meant to do.

I think it is hard for most people including myself to understand that you can actually say “No”. That you don’t have to go to every function. I decided many years ago that as a mother my weekends had to be saved and reserved for my children. And so I stopped accepting invitations on weekends. Even today it is very difficult to get me out on a weekend.

Having 5 kids in 9 years I realized that family had to come first. It was hard because I didn’t have the tools I have now, the ability to cut away the distractions that are there in this world. And we are constantly bombarded by them. These distractions are only taking us away from our authentic selves.

Initially it was tough but I realize that it’s all your stuff being reflected back at you and you are the one who needs to take responsibility and work with whatever it is that you need to address in that moment.

Of course I didn’t have that information and it took me a long time to get there but it’s been a lot easier to focus on what is really important as a result. We are so wrapped up in our own conditioning about what we weren’t allowed to do that it stops us from moving forward. I believe that you must look within yourself and try and see what can you do to make your life healthier, fulfilling and easier because when you do that it will make the lives of others around you the same. I don’t believe we were born in this world to suffer but many people are bound to that mindset. Taking responsibility for myself was a huge leap. There was no one out there who was going to be there with me.

You seem to have raised your children differently. When I agreed to interview you, the thing that caught my eye first, during my research was an interview your oldest child, Eliza had done in the media. I was surprised at young Eliza’s maturity, dignity and her interests. In a world full of stories about many of the seemingly spoiled, bratty children of the rich and famous who spend their time either partying or being caught doing something not quite legal, here was a young girl into things like Yoga, regenerative farming projects, studying in Tanzania to examine the effect of multinational corporations on communities, and I thought to myself – “I wonder what the parents are like.”

I’ve always believed that with money comes great responsibility. And very early on I made the conscious decision to really be there for my children and not be the traditional parent but really deeply listen to them. Let the child go, be open to conversations – what you give out you get back in a funny kind of way. I believe you must make your home a safe refuge where everyone can come, drop their barriers and just be themselves. By being present and aware in the moment and knowing that there is nothing beyond that. If the child is with me, that child is my world and that time spent is the most important. Don’t dwell on what has been, what will be… but what is. We never pushed our children to do anything other than what their heart tells them. If my husband and I are going for a meditation we won’t push them to come with us. If they want to participate they have to come of their own free will, and they must find their own way.

The Meditator – it really spoke to me. I felt like I had been with it, been it in many lifetimes. And you have to be spiritually creative, spiritually in a space where you can give life to something like this beautiful piece.

I never saw myself as a creative person but I took to sculpting.. and was surprised when it started taking shape. So much is found when you still your mind. Silent meditation has been my path. The Meditator came to me through a meditation.

Meditation has brought me into a place of peace, extraordinary peace, I would say. I’ve explored different forms of meditation starting with transcendental meditation over two decades ago. I went from that to other things and now have my own meditation practice; and I see how beneficial it has been in my life.

I want others to receive the same benefit and when The Meditator developed I wanted to share its energy for the greater good. The plan was that all the money from the sale of The Meditator would be used towards demystifying meditation and mindful meditation. Every time we sell a piece the proceeds will go towards creating a space where people can come and quietly meditate in silence in a non denominational center and they don’t have to worry about the religious aspect .

Will you share the poem you wrote about it?

This is the image of you
It’s everything and it’s nothing
It’s a symbol of emptiness and wholeness
The diamond shaped head represents wisdom and knowledge
Of who you are in the moment
And the diamond in the heart is love
Love of who you are
Be gentle to yourself
And give yourself the gift of love

To know more about Lady Marina Cowdray’s work and the beautiful meditation space Cowdray Hall go to www.marinacowdray.com and http://www.cowdrayhall.co.uk/